Oh, that wacky Rick Astley

A truly spectacular moment in the life of Riley Payne. My favorite part is how awful Rick Astley is at lip-synching.

This is for Andie!

From Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal. Happy Thanksgiving?

Nice try, history. Better luck next time.

Deleted scene from The Office. Dwight's talking head is pretty dang amazing.

Yes, We Can.

I think you guys know who you need to vote for.

LUNG SHARKS

I went to Graywhale today while I was out malling around. Would you like to know what I found there? Yes? TRAUMA CENTER: UNDER THE KNIFE. The best DS game ever in the world. Including Phoenix Wright. Sorry! It is!

You have to operate on people. People that have lung sharks. Behold:



Yeah, that's some pretty hardcore bronchitis.

<3, Jessy

its time for me to live up to my family name and face full life consequences

The best fanfiction ever created.

Ah! Oh my gosh. This man is so fantastically, charmingly insane.

Everyone just go to his website. Just go. OMG A LINK! I think it might be the best website I've ever seen. NO JOKE. Too bad he didn't rate everything in the world. <3, Jessy.

Chad Vader

I lolled.

Barack Roll

Check out the sweet moves, people. McCain would break his old man hips if he even thought about groovin' like Obama. :D

Chemistry is awesome.

I know a certain someone is always going on about Physics this, Physics that, but Chemistry is pretty cool too! Am I right?

Is it in you?

It was in me!

OK, now, before we go any further, you have to make a pact with me not to be grossed out. We cool? We cool.

OK, now that those other losers have left, we can get on with the relation of the fantastic experience that happened today.

So, some of you may be familiar with my car, Marcus Garvey (bless his little heart). Now, I love him to death, but since he's black, with a black leather interior, when I try to save gas by driving with my windows up, I occasionally die of heatstroke. Today, as rivers of sweat coursed down my body, and I floated down the road in Marcus' spacious interior, a revelation came to me. If the men and women dying for our country on Arrakis can drink their own sweat,

You shut your mouth and listen!

It was delicious. Now I know why the Fremen use those stillsuits, not to conserve water, but to enjoy that delicious beverage. If they bottled this, I would drink it. It had a subtle flavor, like a sweet lemony citrus fruit, but it was also faintly salty, serving to accent the sweetness. I can see myself in the not too distant future, taking a long swig from my catchpockets and sighing with relief. Then I ride a Sandworm and kill a dude with a Crysknife. Awesome.

Mixing it up

Instead of telling you what you should do, I am going to tell you two things you should never ever do.

1. Read breaking dawn. (you'll probably explode or Commit suicide. Both very likely outcomes.)

2. Name your child RENESME CARLIE CULLEN. ( Nessie for short) After both you and your wife's parents.

This is all that can be said about Breaking Dawn.

SPAMALOT

Today I'd like to talk about Spam. Not SPAM, the pseudo-food in a can. Spam in my Gmail 'Spam' folder. I've been going through it lately, unsubscribing from things, whittling down the spam I get day so that the messages number in the dozens, not hundreds (eeep!). Now, I mostly get those excellent 419 scams about people on their death-bed, wanting to send me millions of dollars. Thanks, but no thanks, exiled queen of Benin. Today, however, I get this wonderful graphic in my Spam folder. It's better than 1,000 Eagle Gate College infomercials. Behold:
A DETECTIVE AND A SCIENTIST?! NO WAY. I can investigate crime scenes? Just like the people on the teevee?! Sign me up, spammers, sign me up!

And so began the first great wizard battle of the new world.

The most worthwhile twenty-eight seconds of your life. Promise.


Basically any video involving Neil Cicirega is the best. Here are a few of my faves.

We Don't Say That In Front of Grandpa

Learn About Governor Bradford

Dark Knight Trailer REDUX
Maybe the Batman trailer is oldsauce now. But whatevs. I still lolled.

THE BATMAN?!

Ok. I am going to be seeing The Dark Knight on Thursday. I am too excited to even comprehend this, especially since I'm going to be seeing it in I(extreme to the)MAX. Anyway, the purpose of this post is to 1. link to this fantastic video on Cracked.com and 2. share this wonderful thing Riley said about The Batman:

It basically made every other superhero movie look like an episode of The Backyardigans.
- Riley Payne, 7/21/08

I Want to Love You Tender

I might send this to Casey anyway, because seriously, I'm not sure if this can wait a year and heif.

PunditKitchen.com

Maybe you should check it out? It's like lolcats with politics and world events. Less cute, but pretty sweet nonetheless. Wait, did I say less cute? HOLD ON I AM WRONG. Mr. Dalai Lama can compete with a lolcat any day of the week. 'Cept Tuesday. We all know about Tuesday. /winkwink. Alright, I'm rambling, sorry. KTHXBAI.

OMG AN EDIT GET IN THE CAR: 'kay why can't the title of a post be a link? This is a mystery. Oh well. Go to PunditKitchen.com :D

Fun times? Yes.

Ok. Here is the haps. Our bff Casey Payne is gone away. To Japan! He is far removed from American culture. We are jealous? Anyway, I thought maybe it would be a good idea to document good movies, books, tv shows, movies, muzaks, video games, and movies while he's away, so that when he comes back, we have a comprehensive (ish) list to refer to. Reindoctrination will be a piece of cake! Or apple pie! :D